The Chase: Evil or Effective?

My opinion: Effective.

It took me a while to understand this, but once I finally did, something magical happened. I realized that any woman can control her relationship by yielding to a little something called "the chase". I'm not one to play games, but when dealing with a guy who is sending mixed signals, pulling back is the best thing to do in order to figure out his level of interest. Let him chase you for a change.

It can be hard to leave a text unanswered for a while before responding to it, or being "unavailable" to talk when that's exactly what you want to do, but challenging a guy to pursue you is a smart move. Why? Because men love the chase.

Nothing excites a guy more than obtaining something that he feels is out of his grasp. He will put more effort into getting it if he knows that there is a challenge involved. He shouldn't feel like he has simply won you over, but as though you are fleeting and could disappear at any minute unless he follows your lead.

As for the girls in relationships, men can get confused in thinking that we will always be at their beck and call. When he gets frustrated when you're busy, yet justifies his own preoccupation, it's time to pull back. Letting him know that you have a life that does not revolve around him should lessen his hypocritical expectations.

We have all done it at one point, whether we chose to "ignore" his messages for a few hours just to test him, or to dissolve all contact to let him know that he's not the only thing on our minds. When done right, this subtle evasive tactic will have him running to you.

Remember that this method only works in small and gentle doses.  Alienation and flat out disinterest are quite the opposite of pulling back, and a successful relationship is based on equal parts of give and take. But the occasional chase has its warranted moments.

The next time you're wondering how he feels, disappear for a little bit. If he cares, he will chase.