Fool for Love

I can never wrap my mind around how women who have been cheated on can so easily forgive and forget. They foolishly run back into the arms of the enemy, and carry on as though their relationship is not tainted by lies and deceit. Their fury withers and fades into sadness, and losing the one they love becomes harder than leaving the one that they should hate.

Hate may be a strong word, but in order to have the strength to leave someone who has hurt you, you need to consciously recognize the pain that they have caused. Failing to get angry and allowing yourself to feel only sadness will make a decision to stay with him all the more likely. Even more likely will be his unchanged behavior. Your refusal to pull away will imply an acceptance of his actions, and the cycle of disrespect that he initiated will continue, with you driving it forward.

It may seem like the hurt of a break up outweighs that of a betrayal, but spending your relationship in a constant state of paranoia and wondering if he will cheat again will be far more painful than ending things to begin with. While it may not surface immediately, a seed of resentment will eventually take root, and nothing will shake it until he is out of the picture. Instead of ignoring its existence, weed it out from the start: Get mad.

We've all heard the expression, "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me." Maybe it's time we listen. If not, we're only fooling, and hurting, ourselves.